FOR TODAY (Monday, May 4, 2009)...
Outside my window...the maple trees are stretching our their new, bright green leaves, separating me from my annoying neighbors yard, finally !
I am thinking...that I need to get outside as soon as possible today !
I am thankful for...my new multi-focal contact lenses ! Bye, bye readers !
From the kitchen...a smoothie with cantaloupe, strawberries, raspberries (frozen), 1/2 c. low fat plain yogurt, splash of orange juice.
I am wearing...black yoga pants, black hoodie and my Mer-Kim apron !!!!
I am creating...pages in my art journal, not pretty pages but "process" pages
I am going...to the post office to mail out some arty stuff to a friend down South.
I am reading... too many self-help books ! I need to focus !
I am hoping... that I come up with a sweet gift idea for my mom for her birthday/mother's day
I am hearing...the quiet in the neighborhood and my house when everyone has gone to work on a Monday am
Around the house...there is dust that needs dusting and dust bunnies I am thinking of naming.
One of my favorite things...the new electric yellow Icelandic Poppy I bought on Sat. to plant in the garden - it is full of furry, crazy buds and blooming in it's pot right now.
A few plans for the rest of the week: meditation tonight, gettting some stuff done in the studio to bring up to Montreal when I go there this Friday, figuring out and purchasing or making a giftie for my mom, wishing my mom Happy Birthday on Wednesday, having dinner and a sleep over with my pal Andrea on Friday night in Montreal.
Here is picture thought I am sharing...
A Parrot Tulip from my garden - it gets more and more beautiful as it spreads its bloom.Next in the mixed bag are some recent art journal pages. Kelly at Soul Humming has joined French Toast Girl in a challenge called "Everyday In May" where you work on creating something everyday for the whole month. I want to commit to things, I really do. But May is not a good month for me to commit to creating something every single day. I have many birthdays, a couple of trips to Montreal involved also and I just can't say I will get the time to do something daily. So I have have committed to "Everyday That I Can In May" challenge. Not as catchy a title, but all I can handle this month !
Here is a page from May 2nd, "You are What You Think" :
and a detail with the saturation and brightness fixed up a bit :
And here is a page from Sunday, May 3rd, "The Last Judgement" (click to enlarge):
And a detail :
In my meeting with my counselor last Thursday, there was a moment when she looked me straight in the eye and said : "Stop judging yourself."
It was one of those moments, you know the kind that stay with you for a long time, maybe forever ? I am the meanest, cruelest, most unjust judge of myself imaginable. I would never, ever judge anyone else with the same set of standards or set of eyes that I use on myself.
The idea that I could learn to not be that type of judge anymore....that I could live without feeling those impossible standards hanging over my head anymore...was such a freeing and hopeful thing. I can't even express the relief I felt when I finally realized that this may be possible !
I have a long way to go to break the cycle I have been in for most of my adult life. But guess what ?
I may just be able to learn to be my own best friend after all ! Now that is hope, my friends !
What is one thing you would like to stop judging yourself for ? Maybe by shining a light on it, the judgement could ease ?
Shine those lights, my Beauties ! Happy Monday !