Tuesday, September 7, 2010

A few Macros in the not so mean time…

P9070008An African Daisy that was not eaten by the squirrels…

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A white geranium that bloomed in a pot of red ones…

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A worn-out zinnia with Thai Basil flowers…

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A lonely begonia tucked beneath its greenery…

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A Dahlia whose pot wintered in the basement and finally graced us with its bloom’s presence in the beginning of September.

P9070010A perfectly dirty Rock My World rock reminding me that I cannot be a perfectionist, especially in the garden…         

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My latest art journal page…

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with a self-portrait I took on a bad hair day recently.

I was thinking a lot as I woke up this morning. That tends to happen on Mondays. (I know it is Tuesday, but it feels like a Monday.)

I was thinking a lot about how much time I spend waiting for things to be just so.

For the “soul satisfying” part-time job to come.

For the sense of accomplishment to feel complete.

For the me I dream of to manifest herself.

I spend a  lot of time in the “making do” mode or the “for now” mode.

“In the Mean Time” mode.

I will take this part-time job for now though it doesn’t rock my soul because I need the cash and it is here now.

I can’t live in the same city as with my family right now, so I will make do and and endure the stresses of  traveling the long road and the super busy weekends to make sure I don’t miss important events.

I am not where I want to be physically at all, but in the mean time I will wear whatever clothes fit, which all seem to be black for some reason.

You know what ?

This making do or for now or in the mean time thing is really just a state of mind.

If I choose to turn it all around in my mind and heart, and make my perspective one that takes advantage of every precious moment of my life instead, watch how things can change :

-How lucky am I that when I really needed some extra cash, a part-time job came a found me ?

-How blessed am I to be able to drive the distance to my favorite peeps and participate in the celebrations of life with them ?

-How great did it feel to buy that perfectly soft black tunic top yesterday that I can make my own with a gorgeous scarf and some of my funky jewelry?

-And how wonderful does it feel in this very moment that I am able to move and walk and sing (though not well to some ears) and make art and LOVE others, life and myself ?

It feels like the way to go, big time !

I am realizing that I need to change my mind set, not my life !

I can LOVE the life I am in, right now.

So the part-time job isn’t a dream job. I have enough love in me to make it fun anyway.

So the weekends get jam packed when I head home to visit. I can slow it down and enjoy the driving and the talking time with David, and let everyone know I will get there when I get there.

So my body isn’t perfect, but I have a few pieces that cover it that feel good against my skin and some kick-ass shoes and accessories will make it work for the artist in me.

And I have this day, this chance to feed my soul, mind and body with good stuff : love, positive vibes, healthy food, movement and creativity.

The thought I am left with is that if I can’t change the whole picture and if I can’t completely change myself in this moment, I can either choose to be unhappy about it and let this day pass me by as I hang out being unhappy and down on myself….

OR

I can choose to

LOVE THE ONE I’M WITH !!!!

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And you know what else ?

When I really think about it, she is pretty damn worthy of that loving ! ;)

Love on your wonderful Self today, Beautiful One !

This is YOUR ONE Precious LIFE!

 

14 comments:

jgr said...

Hi Kim,
A fabulous post!! It reminds me of a favorite quote: "Bloom where you are". Have a good week!

patti said...

You ARE gorgeous Kim! I love your attitude! xx

priti.lisa said...

This is THE best post I've ever read, Kim! It should be printed and given to women (and men) everywhere! I mean it!

Whenever I catch myself having those "living in the meantime" thoughts...I think
How dare you, Lisa? Complain? Just try living someone else's life! At least you can handle yours!
That usually shuts me up and I start pluging away again, LOL.

You Rock Kim :)
Hugs

Dianne said...

What an absolutely wonderful post! I so agree with you... and you said it so well... Love the post! Love the attitude! You so rock!

Lynn said...

Yes we are with ourselves always and if we don't love ourselves how can we love anyone else?

Cinner said...

Kim, I love the post,frame of mind is everything...remember your beautiful just as you are right now with that wonderful loving heart of yours. hugs,

Lisa said...

Whoo HOOO! I feel like getting up and dancing! Stunning perspectives on all of this...it so makes my soul smile. And to not just propose it, but to make it real...to turn it specifically on yourself and pick out the part-time job and weekend time and body love...SO powerful.

I LOVE that journal entry as well...AWESOME message to yourself (and all you have allowed to see). Thank you so much for sharing all of this!

dosfishes said...

Hey Kim, Great post. I am glad you are not a perfectionist, and you flow with your work so beautifully, it is hard not to look around the corner for the perfect job, the perfect location, the perfect life.
It is so much braver to just live the life you are living, so give your self a big hug big heart because you are putting it out there in a living and great way. xox Corrine

Karin Bartimole said...

so very true wise one, in the mean time is the perfect time. when it feels awkward - awkward is perfect for right this moment; painful? perfection; joyful, ah perfection; slipping with ease through the sensations of life moment by moment with out struggle. easier said than done, eh?! but a fine goal i strive for :) much love beautiful perfect Kim

Anonymous said...

Hi Precious One!
Now THAT"s AN AHAAA MOMENT!!!!
May you heart always find joy, and peace and fun and the present moment. How great you are!! That's perfection!
Love you so much,
Mom

The Bodhi Chicklet said...

Those late and unusual bloomers and things I can really identify with. Loving yourself, that's one of life's challenges but I think you (and me) are getting there. Rock on girlie!

rachel awes said...

& that heart
BELONGS
on your cheek!
YES! LOVE THE ONE YOU'RE WITH!!
how i adore this & you!
of course this one fits
in a field of flowers.
xoxox

Meri said...

I can't hear this Crosby, Stills and Nash without thinking of my ex. That was his life story.

missy k said...

I LOVED this post.

I AGREE so much with post.

I like to try and enjoy all the stuff I have to do, even the dull stuff, at least I am ABLE to empty the bin and take out the rubbish, stand at the worktop and make packed lunches... I would really miss the dull stuff if I COULDN'T do it. I would WANT the dull stuff.

I want to live in the moment and fully enjoy the now. Thank you for showing me your new perspective!