My Very Own Superhero !

Image from Sherry's zine site.

The amazingly supportive, incredibly strong, remarkably witty and immensely loving, Sherry Lee at Everyday Possibilities has just launched her "Be Your Own Superhero" zine in order to raise funds for breast cancer research through the Canadian Breast Cancer Foundation.

Sherry is a thriver, survivor, life-liver extraordinaire who raises money for this cause so close to her heart, and the hearts of so very many of us, each and every year through a variety of creative endeavors. This year, she asked several of her artist friends to collaborate with her to create a beautiful, inspirational zine around the theme of being your own superhero. I was honored and proud to be one of the contributors.

So head on over to the zine scene and order your copy now. You will be giving yourself a gift of great inspiration and you will be giving the gift of hope back to your world. And don't forget to give some love on Sherry while you are there ! She so deserves it !

“What I do you cannot do; but what you do, I cannot do. The needs are great, and none of us, including me, ever do great things. But we can all do small things, with great love, and together we can do something wonderful.”

- Mother Teresa

Happy Wednesday, you generous, loving beautiful Ones!

Spill It !!!

Edited September 30, 2009 - I WON !!!!!! The fun begins tomorrow ! So excited ! Told you Fall was going my way ! So Very, very thankful...

Hey did you Lovelies see this ?

Carmen Torbus is running this super mondo gorgeous workshop called "Spill It ". Wouldn't it be great to play along ? I would love to and that is why I am taking this chance to maybe win free tuition for the class.

You can find out more about all the fun here and watch this sweet video of Carmen promoting the workshop and sharing her own process with us.

Straight Talk with Carmen from Carmen Torbus on Vimeo.

Hope to see you there !

I am all over the place but it feels good !

"K i m b o, where are y o u ????"

I am here. I am just kind of all over the place. There is a lot going on and most of it is really good. I am just struggling to keep focused in all the wonderful things that are presenting themselves to me to choose from.

I have to remember that I don't have to say "yes" to everything in the hopes that that is the thing that will take me where I am going. I figured out yesterday at meditation class that I need to be "at peace" with my decisions. Another words, if I stop and ask myself "Does this feel like something you can feel your heart and soul sing about doing ?" If the answer is yes, then I agree to it. If the answer is no, then I go to "Imagine you are at the end of your life. Do you think you will live to regret not doing this if you say no ?". If I feel like I will have regrets, then I do the thing - if I feel like it will mean nothing in the end, I say "No.". I feel like I can get some peace about my decisions this way.

I will be working at putting this one to the test today in this exciting and new time for me. Wish me luck !

Singer Napping on the daybed last spring,

Rest in Peace, sweet old Lady.

So last week, we lost our sweet Singer cat. In the end, we got assistance from the vet to help Singie leave her old body behind. She was struggling, we were struggling and David, as Singer's human being, made the decision to get some help. It was a hard decision, of course, but the right one for us. Singer left the world so peacefully, with the hands of people she loved gently touching her and whispering how good she was, and on the cozy, soft blanket she lay on was a little rock with the words "precious one". I know she is purring and singing her Singie song up there in heaven now.

Things were of course very tender here this weekend. One of the things we did to sooth our hearts a little was to go here :

The sights, smells and sounds of the ocean do a lot of healing.

Plus we were there together, me and my sweet man.

Just sitting and watching and breathing feels sooo good.

And you get to see stuff that makes you smile, like the powerful stance on this seagull.

"I am Super Seagull !"

We took the time to share some extra t.l.c. while we were there...

(notice the straight line formed from our kiss to the rock and then to the seagull

- cool huh ?)

Oh and here is a shot of the graffiti on the beach wall. ;)

Hurting heart ? Head to the beach if you can. Smooch with a loved one even better !

Hearts feeling better a little at a time...

I have been doing quite a bit of art work but I can't share it here for two reasons. Most of it was finishing up creating a journal for my lovely friend Arlene in Alberta as part of our Canadian Chickies Swap. The journal is on its way to her now and I don't want to spoil the surprise. I also forgot to scan it in or take any photos of it at all as I was late getting it out in the mail and packaged it up before I thought about that part !!!! I hate it when I do that !

Hopefully, Arlene will take a few shots for me before she plays in it ! It turned out really well and I did a few pages inspired by the journal play I did with Judy Wise at Squam which turned out great !

And speaking of Judy, I did do some work on the en caustic piece I did in her Transparent Layers class. We had only a few outlets to use our heat guns with in the Sap House classroom at Squam so I didn't get to finish my melting on the beeswax and making it into a nice smooth layer over all of my collage. Here is what it looks like after a bit of work at home :

"She wanted to save the world but she could only save herself."

- en caustic collage piece - Sept. 2009)

The wax is still a little thick in places for my liking

but it does kind of look "space-like" so I may leave it like this.

Detail

(Carolyn gave me the fantastic face with the head piece from her images. I must ask her where it came from. I changed up the hair. The bunny is my own drawing. The entire main figure was inspired by a piece that Judy did showing a woman holding a chicken in her arms. The hands came from that piece as Judy gave us a copy of it to work with.)

The last bouquet of flowers from my back deck container garden.

So this fall is proving to be a really full one for me. Between the lessons I learned about myself through Squam, the wonderful, wonderful friends I have made as a result of putting myself out there in my search for a community of like-minded peeps, and the opportunities to create postive change in my life and my world that are coming up all around me, I feel the true feeling of harvest ! I am a Fall baby after all (October 9th I will be 44 - WOW!), so maybe it makes sense that it is all coming together in this season for me.

What I do know for sure is that I am sooooo very grateful for it all. I feel blessed in so many ways and I am looking forward to spreading the blessings around ! This Big Heart Walking is still on the move !

(David spotted this rock when we first got to the beach - how perfect is that !

Better than a bouquet of flowers any day for the Rock Fairy in me !)

Big Love on this glorious Tuesday, Beautiful Ones !

Some Gifts for Today...

Some gifts for today...

This beautiful bloom greeted me in the sunbeam in my studio bay window this morning.

My hibiscus plant is about 4 years old and it spent the summer outside.

We brought it in last week when frost threatened.

I know it likes its sunny fall and winter window home.

I think it gave me this awesome gift today to let me know it !

And this was in the mail box this morning.

Check out the sender's label !!!!

Wrapped up inside was this gorgeous thing!

A silver bracelet, especially engraved

inside and out for me from my dear, dear Writer-Lady Friend !

She also wrote me this beautiful note.

Yup, I cried.

I feel so special, and so loved, and so seen for just who I am.

That is some gift !

I am telling you once again,

if you ever feel unsure about whether you are loved,

give some loving out into the world.

Love on someone else

and that Love will come back to you ten-fold.

There is no doubt in me that

Love is the answer

to every single question.

So David and I are putting some extra big love on this little lady today.

This is Singer.

She is twenty-one years old.

David is Singer's human,

and she puts up with rubs and loving from me when he isn't around.

Singer is in the process of leaving her body today,

and we are sitting in loving vigil for her

and celebrating the long, long life she has had,

and the joy and love that she has brought into the world.

I know my Big Black Cat, Georgie, will meet her on the other side

and show her the ropes and share his chair with her.

Hug your kitty cats and other sweet loved ones close today

in her honor, okay,

and take some time to celebrate those gifts.

Much love, beautiful Ones.

More Squam Lists...

Some more lists of Squam Stuff...

Top Ten Beautiful Sights - this could have been the top 100 instead, at least ! So much beauty to be seen...

(click to enlarge any of the photos and lists)

Flowers on the Playhouse steps - Jenny Doh spoke here...so beautifully.

The lake from Sap House - our classroom for two days

Jonatha Brooke sings by the campfire

This is Angel from Austin, Texas - our unofficial roomie and oh so talented artist friend

Some of my Biggest and Best Squam Lessons :

# 1 for me I think is that I can be the Big Heart Walking, Shiny One, that I am no matter where I go. You know the old saying "Don't let anyone hide your light under a bushel" ? I have been hiding my own light under this big ugly bushel for a long time, and now that I have learned how good it feels to shine it again, I won't let anything stop me.

Our room before Carolyn and I settled into it - cozy sanctuary,

but it would have been soooo much better with some heat !

My own art - face painted upside down, fearlessly, from Judy's Play Book class

There were some miracles at Squam, everyday miracles that sparkled so brightly and will be with me forever when I think of my experiences there. Judy Wise jokingly calls them "Pink Unicorn Moments" ! Love it ! Here are a few :

My Beautiful Room-Mate and new Dear Friend, Carolyn -

how wonderful it was to share our stories with one another so safely and

with such friendship love.

This is a photo of me wearing the necklace I bought from Georgia on Vendor Night, this gorgeous girl who was selling beautiful necklaces with the wings of butterflies pressed between glass and sealed in with solder (they come from a butterfly farm that collects the wings from dead butterflies). Among the butterfly wings was this peacock feather. I knew the necklace was for me. David once bought me a bouquet of peacock feathers in a long stem rose box when I had told him months before that I loved their colors so very much.

I got to share my story with Georgia - we had a "pink unicorn" moment of perfection.

The back of the necklace was perfect too...

for a Queen with big old wings !

Putting Down The Landing Gear....

I am home again. It is Monday, September 21st, 2009 and Squam is over and I am living in the afterglow now.

Above are some pictures of my Big Heart Walking apron that I talked about in my last post. Believe it or not, I did not have a photo of myself wearing it at Squam. I actually took these this morning on my back deck. There are lots of things I didn't get pictures of. I feel kind of bad about that but luckily, Carolyn, my roommate and new sister/friend extraordinaire took a ton which she will share with me soon.

(Check out the Canon on this Cool Chick !)

It was a huge, busy, quite cold, inspiring 4 days in my life, this Squam Art Workshop experience. Life changing, I think and certainly, rich and full of colorful details. I am not sure how to talk about it here. I feel like today is about making a safe landing after flying out far and wide and to all sorts of new heights and low lying areas.

(Porter's Lodge - My very, very rustic, Squam home)

I want to share it all with you but that is kind of impossible ! I am still figuring out what lessons I have learned as a result of my time in that place so different from my daily life, and I am missing so many of my Squamie Mates this morning ! The most important thing about SAW for me was the people I met and connected with. They were wonderful, brave, open, fun-loving, supportive and creative people all there soaking up the most of their own experience, just like I was. I know it is going to take some time for it to all settle in me, especially being away from some of my new tribes women ! ;) I have to say I am feeling a little lost today.

The Long House - Registration place - Rockywold-Deephaven Camp

The number one best gift I got out of the whole thing was the gift of Carolyn's friendship. I can't believe we only met in person 5 days ago. I know I have a friend forever now and that makes me really happy. Plus she only lives an hour or so away so we can definitely see each other and play some more soon !

Carolyn and Me Up Close

Let me also add that I am so thankful about the weather we had. Though the cold was really hard to take (it went down to the high 30's at night and the cabins have NO heat !!!!), the sun made the whole place sparkle all day long.

When I was trying to think about what and how I would share Squam Art Workshop stuff on the blog, I thought up doing Top Ten Lists like David Letterman. I am writing those to put into my journal to document my Squam adventures and I thought I would share them here too. Here are a couple that I have written so far today and I will add in some more in my post tomorrow.

Top 10 Words and Phrases

(click to enlarge)

(Flowers waiting for us when we arrived - some for every room)

Top Ten Great Things about The Classes

(I took Judy Wise's classes Translucent Layers and The Play Book, and Sarah Ahern's class Text and Images)

The magnificent, funny, down to Earth, sweet Judy Wise

shares her tricks with my housemate, Kriss.

Judy and me. She totally made my Squam !

Top Ten Squam Foods

The food at the Dining Hall was fantastic ! Fresh, warm, hot, yummy, plentiful, and best of all, I didn't have to cook it !

Number 5 - The Queen makes and artful sundae

So there is just a little bit about what I experienced. I don't think I am going to be able to share it in a way that really makes you feel what I did. It wasn't all Pink Unicorns and sparkles. There was silly, high school-ish cool kids vs every one else stuff that happens often when a big group of women get together. There was the physical challenge of being very cold a lot of the time. There was getting used to walking a good ten minutes in the cold, through the woods, before getting a cup of coffee in the morning. But there was also the companionship and support of fellow artists, the inspiration from the beautiful natural surroundings and from the talented people around you, there was the fireside wine chats and laughs with wonderful housemates and new friends, and there was the quieter giggles and sharing with my sweet and so very real roomie and friend, Carolyn, not to mention art play and more art play and more art play...

Squam.... quite a trip, my beautiful ones !

Oh and one last thing...

When I woke up this morning, I decided I wouldn't blog or even go on the internet. I thought I would want to just take the time on my own and document stuff, journal and draw and write it all done to remember it all. I wasn't even going to turn on my computer ! As you can see I changed my mind. Blame it on Patti Digh !

David called over to me from his computer as I poured my coffee this morning "Patti Digh wrote a post all about you on her blog !" he said. What ???? Yes, it's true - my favorite writer-lady in the world posted about little old Queenly Me ! Told you I was living in life-changing times !

I am going to slowly keep going through my photos and my Squam memories and put my feet back on the ground. I feel like of like a different person today. Well, maybe not that different but definitely shinier. That's it, I think...Squam buffed me up and made me a little shinier. That has to be a very good thing in the long run, don't you think ?

Can't wait to catch up with of you asap. I am glad to be home !

Off I Go !

I am so ready. Bags are 95 % packed. My heart is 100% full. I feel like that little kid in the Disney World commercial saying "I'm too excited to sleep !!!"

I made myself an apron to mess up in the midst of all my crazy prep. yesterday. I couldn't use the beautiful one that Arlene made me last spring as it is just too beautiful, so I took an old jean apron I had from Ikea that I was using in the basement stained glass room and used a t-shirt transfer sheet and a piece of cotton muslin. I printed the piece above with my logo onto the t-shirt transfer (reversed the image so the writing looks right), ironed it onto the white cotton muslin, grunged it up a bit with some fabric paint and sewed it onto the jean apron with crazy stitches (easy for me who has a hard time sewing straight !). I didn't have time to photograph it but I will be sure to get a shot of me wearing it from Squam.

Okay, this is it. I am shutting down the computer. Carolyn will be here in about 2 hours. Eeeeeeeeeeeeeee ! Just so excited !

Love you guys ! You are definitely the wind beneath my wings (too bad that song is so corny - the message is beautiful!). The Queen is air born...

Wings are feeling strong today...

One more sleep...

(if you can call lying awake and packing and planning in your head until 1:30 or so and then waking up around 6:00 raring to go sleeping ! :)) !!!

I feel like a kid before a big birthday party or even before Christimas !

I loved all your wishes for me in your comments on my last post. It really means so much to me. It has helped me make my wings strong and ready for this flight !

"You were only waiting for this moment to arrive..."

See you when I land, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful Ones !

The Queen is taking wing...

So in three days, it will be Wednesday, September 16th, 2009. This is a very important day for me. It is the day I go to S.A.W. , the Squam Art Workshops in Holderness, NH.

I am so excited I could burst !

I am also a little nervous...

Okay , a lot nervous. But I know I will be fine.

I am so proud of myself for stepping way out of my comfort zone

and taking the chance for me to hang out for 4 days with

a whole bunch of art loving adventurers just like me.

I don't know anyone in person,

though I "know" quite a few people from Blogland who are going to the retreat.

But I do have a blogpal who I feel like I know

and who is going to be my roomie

and who has already been such a great support for my neuroses

as I get ready to go and worry about "highschoolish" stuff

like what to wear, how will I fit in, what to bring, who will I eat lunch with...etc...

My blogpal/brand new bff is Carolyn

and I can't wait to meet her in person on Wed. as we travel up to Squam Lake (about 1 1/2 hours from home !) together !

You know when you embark on something and you have a feeling that it is the beginning of something really important, something that will have an impact on your whole life ?

Well, that is how I feel today,

as I get stuff together and prepare to go on my adventure.

I know I am giving myself a gift that is for my artist self and for my soul at the same time.

And that feels really good,

kind of like spreading wings that I just realized I have.

It is going to be a pretty busy couple of days, as I scurry around getting everything together (trying to relax into that instead of being perfectionist Kim - she is such a pain !!!). I don't think I will have time to post between now and Wednesday. I have also decided not to bring my computer to Squam. I want to soak everything up, and fill myself and my spirit. I am bringing the camera though !!! And I just may take a video or two while I am there. I will take you all with me in my back pocket, and I promise to share my experiences when I get back.

I will see you then and say some prayers that I remember to use those wings !!! ;)

Happy Sunday, beautiful Ones.